Yes, today was pretty good (so far, at least - I suppose I could still ruin it). I managed to eat Mexican without having a disaster. No small feat, is it? I ate a grilled chicken salad topped with salsa instead of salad dressing, and about a dozen chips with salsa. For breakfast I had a PB & banana sandwich. Supper is going to be carrot sticks and a English muffin topped with homemade hummus, red pepper, and tuna. Sounds a little strange, but I'm up for anything, especially if it's cheap.
Last night I rode the recumbent for half an hour while doing light arm conditioning, then spent about 10 minutes doing various crunches. I finally figured out that I can do crunches on the bed without hurting my back. My mattress is firm enough that I still get the effect of the exercise, and it's definitely better than trying to do crunches on a hardwood floor. :)
I did it... I stepped on the scale. I knew it would be bad, so it didn't surprise me that I am only five pounds lighter than the day I went in the hospital to have Braeden.
But you know something? I don't care. I can't change what's already done. There's no sense in beating myself up because I lost the weight and gained it back, or even for gaining it in the first place. Can't do anything about it now, can I? I can only look forward, and that's what I am going to do.
Yesterday I got a piece of paper in the mail that really kicked me into gear. The first sentence read "The Chattanooga State Nursing Program is pleased to inform you of your acceptance into the 2009 night nursing class." Once I got over the excited jitters and called everyone I knew to tell them the news, it hit me that it's now or never. No more excuses. I am done being fat. I have a solid, concrete, real motivation.
A lot in my life has changed since January. So many things are looking up for the better - our new home, Jeff's new job, our marriage. . . might as well add my health to the list.