Love my daddy!

Funny how people can be on the same wavelength at the same time...

I've been struggling with motivation. No surprise there. It seems that after that first go-round, when I did so remarkably well, my drive to keep going just completely fizzled. I was on the phone with Mom, discussing this very thing. Do I got back to Weight Watchers or try it online? Or should I try something different altogether?

One problem I've had lately is that my feet are constantly hurting. Based on research, and a tip from a friend, I'm reasonably sure I have a nifty case of plantar fasciitis going on. Unfortunately, being on my feet makes it hurt worse, so exercise feels like its bringing more pain than gain. I'd looked at exercise bikes, but hadn't found exactly what I wanted.

Anyway... back to Mom. She has a call come in from Dad and says she'll call me right back. A few minutes later, the phone rings, and she's laughing. Turns out that as we were talking about my Big Dilemma, Dad was on the internet ordering me a bike! LOL

Even better - he got me exactly the kind of bike I had wanted but couldn't find. Here's a picture:



I had tried a similar bike at Curves and loved how comfortable it was. The back support and seat are fantastic - you don't get a sore bum and your back doesn't ache. Plus it's a fairly quiet bike, so you can watch TV, read, or do whatever. It should roll in here (hee-hee - get it? roll in here?) in a couple of weeks, and I can get some quality cardio time without hurting my feet so badly.

Love you, Dad! :)

Be Careful What You Wish For

I got mine... weighed in this morning... exactly what I weighed in last Sunday.

Grrrrrrrrr.......................

Sunday, No Weigh-In

It didn't take long... I'm already feeling discouraged. Typically the munchies strike about a week before AF - this month, the munchies decided to visit early. It hasn't helped that things have been so utterly hectic. We just got back from a whirlwind trip to Mom's, where I ate too much much (couldn't let a Mrs. Pace's chocolate cake just sit there untried, could I?), even though for the most part I at least attempted to make good choices.

This week should be a little bit slower, so I am resolving to exercise at least three times. I only have Wednesday night tied up with church. Maybe I can squeeze some much-needed housework in while I'm at it.

I wasn't home this morning to weigh in (on my terribly inaccurate and inconsistent scale), so I will check in tomorrow with a number that I am praying is at least no more than last week's. We shall see, eh?

Mid-Week Check-In

Yup. I definitely picked a tough week to start a diet. With the meetings at night, it means that we have been eating out after church. That's not so much a problem - I have learned to navigate my way through a menu. The real issue is that I depend on leftovers for healthy lunches. Often I revamp them a bit (i.e., using grilled chicken to make pitas or salads), but operating like this is both a time-saver and money-saver. Without leftovers this week, and with a dwindling stash in the refrigerator, meals have been tough. I'm doing the best I can, though.

I have managed to squeeze in one workout, plus a 90-minute house-cleaning frenzy. Tonight will be more cleaning (heavy stuff like mopping and vacuuming and that sort of thing), and I might get ambitious and do a workout video if I'm not too tired.

This weekend I'm heading to Mom's, which shouldn't be too bad. Mom & Dad are always so supportive of my weight loss attempts, and they go out of their way to make sure the menu is good for me.

So that's my update for the week. I've stepped on the scales a few times, but I'm not paying much attention to the numbers until Sunday. Ta-ta!

Monday, Monday...

I always seem to pick the worst weeks to start a new habit! We're having a gospel meeting at church, and my evenings are completely tied up through Wednesday. It's going to make finding exercise time tough, and eating right tougher.

Must press on... must press on...

This week's goals are to drink my 64 oz of water each day and to exercise 4x, for at least 10 minutes each. Also, I created a journal on the computer to record what I eat and my exercise for the day. One thing I've learned my from Weight Watcher days is that journaling really does keep me more accountable. At the very least, it helps me understand the trends in my weight changes.

I just started in the middle of last week, but each Monday I want to list a few things I accomplished the previous week. I am proud that I pulled out a WATP video and FIRM video, even if they were short ones. I ate out a few times, but made healthy choices.

To quote one of Bebo's favorite little blue engines: I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...

Where the Pedal Meets the Metal

I have a confession to make. This blog came dangerously close to deletion - my finger was on the button more than once. I quit. I didn't care. (Okay, I did care, but not enough to do anything.)

I had to quit WW because of transportation. Again. And since I was only partially motivated anyway, quitting meetings popped the balloon entirely on my drive.

But big changes are happening in my life. This fall I am taking prerequisites to the nursing program, and if all goes well, I'll be accepted and actually beginning my clinicals in just a little over a year. Here's the thing: I am so horribly out of shape and obese that I can't be on my feet for more than 30 minutes at a time. They hurt so much it feels like I'm walking on gravel.

Do you know what I want to do? I want to help deliver babies. I want to work in the NICU, with preemies and AIDS babies and crack babies. I want to eventually get a midwife certification and do missions work in Africa, teaching pregnant women and new mothers how to take care of themselves and their children.

And I can't do any of that unless this weight comes off. Besides being a horrible example, it's so inhibiting... I have to be able to survive clinicals, not to mention 12-hour shifts. It just ain't gonna happen in my current state. The weight has to come off. It has to happen. No more goofing off. No more excuses. No more late-night Krystal runs. No more pretending that what goes in my mouth won't land right on my thighs.

It's now or never. This is the end. My dreams can't go on hold any longer.

Post-Game Score

I really need to update the look of this blog. That might be my project for today. . .

Anyhoo - official weigh-in last night: down 2 lbs. I breathed such a sigh of relief. It's discouraging to go a whole month without any change.

If all goes well (though nothing has, of late), I will exercise this evening. I'll keep ya posted.

Monday, Monday

All I really want to do is take a nap. This is not what is going to happen. Spurred on by seasonal allergies, my cough is getting out of control. I did set up an exercise schedule, but might not be feeling well enough to start. I tried to keep it very simple. No routine is longer than 40 minutes, and I've schedule easy routines that I know won't kill me.

But this afternoon I have a dentist appointment and a WW meeting - and something tells me I may be so worn out when I get home that exercise will be the farthest thing from my mind.

Me, this week.

Frustrated and discouraged and really wanting to give up but really afraid to at the same time. I wanted to exercise, but between being sick, finicky computers, and a car accident (no one was hurt), physical activity has not been on the radar. I'm trying so hard to behave myself. Well - at least after eating the last of the birthday cake. I finally shoved it in the trash can so I wouldn't be tempted to eat it all by myself. The dumb thing is - I don't even like store-bought cakes.

I'm tired and cranky. Maybe tomorrow will be better. At least I can say I didn't totally blow it today; I kept fairly well in the realms of the Core rules. . . excepting the piece of cornbread and half a biscuit I ate at Cracker Barrel tonight. I have the whole weekend ahead of me to restrain myself. Wish me luck.

Exercise - the Final Frontier

I hate to exercise. It's exacerbated by being so pitifully out of shape. I need to just buckle down and do it, but - I. Don't. Wanna.

Got to.

Don't wanna!

Got to.

Don't wanna!

(hear the little shoulder angel/devil dueling?)

I am not going to exercise tonight. However, I am going to bust my tail cleaning my house, which does count as exercise. Trust me - with the condition I let my house get into, I can burn some serious calories.

So I'm off now - to boldly clean when no man has cleaned before!

Motivation Is a Good Thing

Yessiree. Every time I've even considered putting food in my mouth that I didn't really need, that hideous picture popped into my brain like a flashing neon billboard. So far, I've done well. The weekend might get tough, but I'm behaving right now. I even turned down a biscuit and cornbread at Cracker Barrel last night! Do you know how hard that is for me to do??

Since I haven't shared a recipe lately, thought I'd clue you in on a couple of high-yumminess-factor meals.

First (and oh-so-easy), bake a sweet potato. Spoon on a little bit of unsweetened coconut milk, add some curry powder and garam masala (it's a spice blend - find it with the rest of the spices at the grocery store), and mash it all together. De-stinkin'-licious. Easy lunch, too, especially if you buy those plastic-wrapped potatoes.

Second: egg salad. Since I'm on Core, I can have the whole egg, though it probably would be better to leave out half the yolks. Still, the yolk is my favorite part. Anyhoo - boil a dozen eggs. Add in fat-free Miracle Whip (or mayo if you're that kind of person), spicy mustard, curry powder, freshly ground black pepper, and sea salt. All ingredients to taste - I just dump it in until I get the texture I want. Delish. Really.

Think I'm going to grill tonight... shish-ka-bobs sound good, no?

Defining Moment

I swore I'd never do it, but I used the "no-weigh" pass tonight. I knew the scale would show a gain, and I simply didn't need that discouragement.

That being said, I had a good food day. I resisted the urge for a bean burrito, and ate (mostly) Core foods. It meant a little improvising, since I haven't done a major shopping trip lately. I did make a fabulous chicken salad (I eat the stuff for breakfast, it's so good!), and I have boiled eggs cooling for an egg salad, too.

In other matters... have you ever had one of those Defining Moments? You know, that trigger that suddenly snaps you back to reality? I had one. A big one. I even hesitate to post this, but the truth is those of you who know me beyond the cyberworld already know what I look like.

Jeff had a "change project" due for school. He had to improve someone (who naturally wound up being me) by encouraging regular exercise. Ha! Because of rain and infrequent opportunity, we only walked 3 days. This meant we had to stage some photographs at the track, which is where that Defining Moment took place.

When I saw the pictures, I was horrified. Literally. I wanted to cry. I didn't know I looked like that. It's not exactly an angle I see often, you know? I just can't believe that's me - it doesn't feel like me! But I know the camera didn't lie. How did I let myself get to this point? My word, I'm a cow.

I think I'm going to enlarge this photo and hang it on the refrigerator. And the pantry. And my computer. And the rearview mirror. I do not want to be this person. Ever. No way. This is not who I am!!!

Time for Handslapping

I've been bad, in the worst sort of way. Without going into too much detail, about halfway through my cycle... bring on the munchies! I get this absurd urge to eat everything, whether I'm remotely hungry or not.

So, in that spirit, I am returning to Core this week. Because I can't eat out on Core, I'm hoping it will keep me in check.

Maybe.

Then again, after facing the disaster that will be my weigh-in tomorrow, maybe not. I might have to go bury my sorrows in a hot fudge cake sundae.

Week 5

Reporting in... I didn't lose this week. I also didn't gain. I think that's to be expected, actually. I've passed the magical 30-year-old mark, and it seems that the weight will not come off quite so easily as when I was 3 years younger. Besides, last week was so great, it somewhat offsets the maintenance of the scale. I didn't gain. This makes me happy. :)

I have tried some wonderful new foods lately. I'm quite taken with Asian- & island-inspired cuisine. I've got to work out a couple of kinks, but I'll be posting recipes as soon as I get them a little bit more to my liking. I love that WW encourages me to try new foods - makes life interesting.

Here's my page for the week. I keep forgetting to take the album to my meeting. Gotta remember that next time!

Week 4 Journal Page

Since I forgot....

Here are two pages I've done for my mini-album. I decided to just make them 4x6, so I can easily (and cheaply) have prints made and stick them in a little brag book. Works quite nicely, if I do say so myself.

I'll post this week's when I've finished it. At the moment I'm a bit stumped.

Yeah, baby!

I can't dance, but I can lose weight! FOUR-point-SIX POUNDS, thankyouverymuch!

I am IN the game again. I'm feelin' it - don't mess with me now!

Oh. My. Gosh.

Where have you been all my life, Peanut Chicken with Vegetables and Noodles? I never dreamed something with such a weird combination of tastes could possibly be this delicious. Jeff needs to get off work pronto or I'm going to eat the entire thing!!! Since I'm a nice person, I'll share the recipe with you. :)

Peanut Chicken with Vegetables and Noodles

1 lb. chicken breasts (or turkey)
1/2 smooth reduced-fat peanut butter
2 tbsp. soy sauce
2 cloves garlic, minced
1/4 tsp. chili powder
1 tsp. minced fresh ginger
1 tsp. garam masala
8 oz. whole-wheat spaghetti
12 oz. bag fresh veggie medley (carrots, broccoli, cauliflower)

Cook chicken. (I chose to grill turkey, but you could also boil it.) Transfer chicken to cutting board, when cool enough to handle, shred into bite-sized strips.

Whisk peanut butter, soy sauce, garlic, chili, ginger, and garam masala in large bowl.

Cook pasta in boiling water. Halfway through cooking time, add vegetables. Cook until both are tender. Drain, reserving 2/3 c. cooking liquid. Stir reserved liquid into peanut sauce. Add pasta, vegetables, and chicken; toss well to coat. Serve warm or chilled.

Serves 6.


Don't knock this until you've tried it. It is incredible!

Something to Report

I almost hesitate to say it, for fear I'll jinx myself - but I feel like I might finally be back on track. I am crossing my fingers it's true. Somehow I just feel more in the swing of things, if that makes any sense.

I did go to WW tonight - I was the only one who stayed for the meeting! I wasn't overly thrilled with my loss - 1.8 lbs over two weeks - but considering I was out of town both weekends, I can't complain too much. It's taken three weeks to lose 2 lbs, but I am not giving up.

You know what makes me happiest about spring & summer? The new wave of fresh, yummy produce. I love the bright colors and delicious flavors. My fave thing to do is grill veggies. All it takes is a foil pouch, a little black pepper, and a splash of EVOO - wrap it up, toss it on the grill, and you've got veggies so good they might as well be chocolate! I could live off of grilled summer veggies - zucchini, carrots, corn on the cob, tomatoes, onions, bell peppers, summer squash - mmm, mmm good!!!

Week 1 Update

Not so hot.

No, not hot at all.

However, I am still creative! :) And since the scrapping bug has hit HARD lately, I decided to motivate myself by scrapbooking my weekly progress and posting it on my fave site ever (2peas). Hopefully forcing myself to a public update will help more. Yeah, I know blogging is "public," but I don't think anyone actually reads this blog. (Not that I'm feeling sorry for myself, though.)

So... I am going to attempt to post the page here, but I'm also going to link to it because I don't think it will be easy to read. Without further adieu, here is Week 1.

Link

Here I Go Again...

I rejoined WW Monday. It's the same old song and dance, so I won't bore you with the details. The good news is that I only gained 5 lbs in my 2-months hiatus from WW.

I'll report back soon.

Changes

Oh, boy. Sometimes it feels as though the world is out to sabotage my efforts. I've already had to quit going to WW meetings and my internet subscription; now it's looking like I'm going to be relegated to Hamburger Helper for meals - not exactly the healthiest choice on the menu.

Still, I am going to keep trying. I have to find a way to make Core cheaper. Maybe more vegetarian dishes? It doesn't bother me to cut way back on meat. I have a ton of couscous in the pantry, so I should probably focus on ways to spruce it up. This is not going to be easy.

If you watch my weigh-in progress to the side, you'll notice that the numbers have jumped. That's partly because I gained weight over Christmas, and partly because my home scale weighs 3-4 pounds heavier than the "official" one at meeting. Besides that, my scale is rather inaccurate. Since I can't afford a new one, it will have to do for now. I'm going to keep a Monday morning WI for the time being. Seems easiest to me.

Necessary Motivation

Mom & Dad are talking about a trip to Disney World this spring. If that's not motivation to lose, I don't know what is. I've got to drop some serious weight, or I will be miserable after walking around the park for two days. I want to enjoy my first trip to the Magic Kingdom, ya know?

You heard me right. I am 30 years old and I have never been to Disney World. Isn't that sad?

Anyway, Days 1 and 2 have passed nicely. I haven't overdone it, I've stuck to the Core plan, and I've been too cold to eat too much, anyway. :)

Everytime I think about eating something I shouldn't, I think about Disney World. So far the strategy is working. Let's hope I can keep up the pace for three months.

Well.....

Deep subject.

It turns out that broken-down cars are not conducive to Weight Watcher attendance. And since we can neither afford to fix the Lumina nor buy a replacement, it means I'm going to have to go solo again with WW.

This is disappointing, but not disastrous.

I've decided to switch back to Core. Since my frequent fast food runs have been eliminated by the car shortage, it means I have to eat a lot of good food here at home. Core has worked so well for me before, so here I go again.

So far, so good. I've decided to switch my start day to Wednesday. Since Core doesn't involve journaling, I really don't need my WW online membership (which I also cancelled because of lack of funds), and my wild run to the grocery store yesterday has taken care of meals for at least the next week - maybe two if I stretch it.

It's been so cold today that I haven't really been hungry. I've had oatmeal and a big bowl of chili, plus one dark chocolate Ferrero Rocher (for one of my 35 WPAs). No water. I can't stand the thought of ice water when it's not even 50 degrees in the office.

I'll keep you posted on my progress - hopefully a little more frequently than I had been doing.

Wish me luck!

Going Nowhere . . . Fast

So much for my 2-lb a week average - I am back up 1.2 pounds. In other words, I've accomplished absolutely nothing in the last month.

After I get back from my Christmas travels, I am going on Core again. For real this time. Maybe that will help me get back on track.

I have every reason in the world to want to lose weight. Now I just to have to find the strength to actually do it.

Belated update

Somehow I got busy and forgot to post my progress from Monday's WI. I recovered somewhat from the previous week's disaster and lost 2.2. Technically, I've only lost 1 pound in two weeks. How lovely is that?

I almost quit this week - not because I'm giving up, but because of a serious lack of funds. After debating it all day, I decided that I was worth the extra $. I did cancel my online subscription, though. This means I'll have to find another way to journal. I prefer using the computer, so maybe I can develop a spreadsheet or something.

It's slow going. My heart isn't always in it, but I don't want to give up, either.

It Coulda Been Worse

I gained a pound. No surprise there. It's time to move on and hope for the best. This could get interesting, since my budget for the next few months isn't going to allow much more than Ramen noodles. I'm going to do the best I can anyway. *sigh* I don't really need another reason to de-motivate myself.

I Ain't Getting Nuttin for Christmas...

... cause I ain't been nuttin' but BAD!!!

Oh, yeah. I hit another one of my gotta-eat-everything-in-sight-and-half-of-what-isn't phases this week.

It was not pretty.

So I've been guzzling water like a Hemi guzzles gasoline and trying to eat well as I can the last couple of days. Maybe tomorrow won't be a total disaster.

In the meantime - I made turkey pot pie, and it was SO GOOD! Here's the recipe - substitute chicken if it's what you have.

Turkey Pot Pie

1 1/2 c. mixed veggies (if frozen, thaw them out first)
1 1/2 c. diced turkey
1 can 98% fat-free cream of chicken soup
salt & pepper to taste
phyllo dough (I used 1/4 of a 16-oz package)

Preheat oven to 350. In a bowl, combine veggies, turkey, soup, and salt and pepper. Spray a 9-in pie plate with cookine spray. Working quickly, layer one sheet phyllo dough in the plate and lightly coat with cooking spray. Repeat until 5 sheets are left. Spoon in turkey mixture. Cover with remaining five sheets. Spray top liberally with spray (or use butter spray). With a knife, cut slits for steam to escape. Bake at 350 for 35-40 minutes. Allow to stand 5 minutes before serving. Serves 4. (5 WWP each)

Now, if you've never worked with phyllo dough, I have to admit I cheated. I could care less about making it look pretty, so I didn't cover the dough with a wet towel while I worked. Technically you're supposed to do that, but if you go fast enough you can get away with just peeling off each layer without the towel. BTW - the stuff is super-thin, like tissue paper. It does tear easily. You'll have to wad the ends up back into the crust, and I rotated each sheet a little so my corners would be spread out evenly around the pie plate. This was my first time working with it, but it tasted fantastic as a crust, and is ten times lighter than your usual pie crust. I will most assuredly be trying it again with other things.

I Survived Round One!

I did it. I made it past Thanksgiving. Honestly, this isn't much of an accomplishment - Mom & Dad were so supportive of me, and so careful to make it easy for me to make good choices that it made the holiday a breeze. The ride home was far worse than the Big Meal itself. By the time we'd fought traffic for 90 minutes longer than usual, I wanted to do nothing so much as devour six double cheeseburgers. (I just ate one single.)

The WI today was good, but not stellar. I lost 2.2 for the week. I was hoping for something a little more exciting - but considering that's nearly six pounds in two weeks, I can't complain.

I have probably said this before, but I am starting to feel the groove again. I've had a few decent WIs, and if I can keep it up for a while, I might get back to my 2-lb per week average from my first try at WW. One of the ladies at the meeting said it looked like I had lost, and I was thrilled to hear it from someone besides my parents or my husband, who I am sure feel somewhat obligated to praise me regardless. (Not that I mind - it's just a little different when it comes from someone else.)

Moving on. . . I have to mentally prepare for Christmas. That will be the tough holiday. I am dreading it from a food standpoint. It looks like we'll be going to Indy this year, which obliterates my original exercise plan. I'm going to have to rethink, and I'm not sure of the best approach just yet.

One more thing - I'm experimenting with leftovers this year, and if it's as yummy as I hope, I'll have some new recipes to share in a few days.

Thankful for a Good WI

Woot! I was down 3.4 pounds this week! This made me very happy, especially since I really blew right past my weekly points after the tornado Thursday. (No pun intended.)

Now to Thanksgiving. . . I am really not stressing this one. My last stint on WW saw my greatest loss Turkey Week, and since Mom & Dad are so supportive, I know they're doing what they can to make sure I have good choices. I have decided to enjoy the foods I love (like Mom's dressing) in moderation. We're lightening some things a little, but not too much. I'm just going to stay out of my WPAs until Thursday and Friday, then go back to dailies only for the rest of the week. If I am careful, I should do well - and maybe get past the 10-lb mark.

Now that would be something to be thankful for! :)